Hello Reader,

Playdates and extended visits with friends are exciting milestones for kids—but they can be nerve-wracking for parents.

One common concern?

Whether or not phones and other digital devices will be part of the mix

In fact, as we’ve read comments in online parenting groups, two opposing viewpoints are fiercely argued.

1. Phone access for safety! Some parents feel more secure knowing their child can call or text if they feel uncomfortable.
2. No phone access for safety! Others worry a smartphone—whether theirs or another child’s—could expose their child to inappropriate content like pornography or violent media.

With such strong feelings on both sides, is there a middle ground?

Yes—and it starts with communication and thoughtful compromises.

1. Text & call mode for devices

If your child is invited to a gathering, ask the host parent if they have any rules regarding access to digital devices.

If you want to send your child with a phone, put it in text-and-call-only mode using parental controls. Let the host parent know. This way, the phone remains a safety tool—not a gateway to unmonitored content.

You can also ask if the host’s child’s phone can be similarly limited during the visit, so the kids are more focused on play and connection instead of being distracted by phones.

2. Try a basic phone or smartwatch

Instead of a full smartphone, send your child with a basic flip phone (they’re available!), a safe phone, or a child-safe smartwatch. These devices typically allow only approved contacts and have no internet access—offering peace of mind with fewer risks.

3. Use a shared phone basket

See if the host would be comfortable collecting all phones in a designated basket at the start of the playdate or party. Phones can be accessed if needed but are otherwise off-limits. This encourages kids to focus on face-to-face fun while ensuring devices aren’t being used inappropriately.

If you’re the host, let the friends’ parents know your plans so the kids will be prepared.

Finding a balance isn’t always easy, but it’s possible—and necessary.

With open dialogue and a few practical tools, we can model responsible parenting and healthy tech habits to create safer, connected environments for our kids.

Kindly,
​
Kristen

P.S. Wondering if your child is ready for a phone? Download our free guide Is My Child Ready for a Smartphone?​